The way we express love is a key factor that influences the success of any relationship. Besides, communication helps you and your partner to know each other deeply as well as solve problems amicably. That said, everyone has a specific thing that makes them feels cherished and loved in a relationship. Such favorites have been found to relate to any of the 5 languages of love. Basically, they are universal categories in which the various expressions of love are placed. It’s important for you to know the love language of your partner in order to reciprocate properly to their feelings. Failure to acknowledge each other’s language of love leads to resentments and dissatisfaction and has largely contributed to unnecessary breakups and betrayals.
The 5 languages of love are:
- Words of affirmation – with this language, you use words to express your affection for another person. They can be simple words like “I love you.”
- Quality time – the core aspect of this language is giving your spouse undivided attention by being together with him or her without any distractions.
- Acts of service – you demonstrate this language by doing something that you think your partner will love. People under this category feel loved when a favor is extended to them.
- Receiving gifts – people who speak this language value gifts as symbols of love and hold onto them dearly.
- Physical touch – people who associate with this category value physical touch as the key element of love. Touching them makes them feel appreciated and wanted. In this article, I aim at delving into a deep discussion of the 5 languages of love in order to help you rediscover yourself and your loved ones.
Now, let’s delve a little further into each one.
Words of affirmation
We feel great when someone compliments us honestly or tells us how they love us. However, affectionate words play a huge role when interacting with people who fall under this category. You have to choose your words wisely. Compliments matter a lot to them and they take every word you say into consideration. Moreover, the tone you use when talking to such people also influences the interpretation of your message. I know you don’t anticipate a situation where you say something important but your partner decodes it negatively simply because you used the wrong tone. Such people tend to be very sensitive and care has to be taken when correcting them for their wrongs. It’s obvious that such partners don’t forgive easily when you insult or tell them negative comments.
Ways in which you can talk this language with your partner are:
- Saying that you love him or her
- Complimenting each other
- Correcting his or her mistake kindly
- Writing honest love letters to each other
The language involves giving someone your full attention devoid of interruptions. Words do not work for people in this group. They feel loved when you spend ample time with them. Distractions and postponing dates affects them severely and makes them feel unwanted. They also get angry when their loved ones are not around. If your partner is constantly nagging you to do something together with him or her and gets angry when you decline, it’s the perfect to realize that he or she needs more of your time.
You can spend quality time with your partner doing the following:
- Watching a movie or TV program together
- Talking and listening while sitting on the couch
- Doing house chores
Acts of service
For people who belong to this category, actions speak louder than actions. The best way to talk the language is doing something that you think your spouse will like regardless of it being a simple or hard task. Doing things for them makes them feel cherished and loved. It simply demonstrates to them that you are thinking about them. A simple act of opening a door or tidying up a room for someone can greatly elevate the love emotions in them. However, it’s important to note that your spouse doesn’t have to ask you to do something for him or her. You need to come up with an idea of an activity that will make them happy. Besides, such people hardly tolerate laziness and require those around them to help them in their activities.
Among the tasks are:
- Vacuuming the house
- Washing dishes
- Weeding the garden
- Washing their clothes
Everyone around the world loves presents since gifting is symbolic of affection. However, when it comes to dealing with people in this category, presents mean a lot to them. Buying gifts for such people gives them a tangible symbol for your love. The monetary value of the gifts does not matter as long as they are given appropriately. It can be that simple seashell from the seashore or even that car they have been admiring for years. It doesn’t mean that your spouse is materialistic if he or she thrives in this language but it’s only that meaningful presents make them feel appreciated.
Touching has always been a great way of communicating love to people around us. It has been proven that touching loved ones do stimulate good feelings of self-love and the need to reciprocate the love shown to us. However, people who fall under this category take the simple act of touching to another level. You must keep touching them to demonstrate your affection for them. Otherwise, they feel that you no longer love them. Nonetheless, the physical touch has to be appropriate. I know you don’t wish for a situation where you scare your loved ones by grabbing or touching them unnecessarily or inappropriately. Touching can range from snuggling together on the couch when watching TV to holding hands when walking along a highway.
The other ways through which you can express love to people in this category are:
- Rubbing their hair
- Stroking their hands
- Patting their back
- Kissing & other physical intimacy
In every relationship, there are two people with different ideologies and ways of demonstrating love. Definitely, people do expect to be loved the same way they love. The various ways of expressing love for one another certainly relate to one or more of the five love languages. It has been proven that each person has a primary and a secondary language of love. In a relationship, the first and the key task is identifying the language of your partner. This is a huge milestone that works miracles in your relationship. It can help to reveal the reasons behind the constant fights with your partner and thus help you to come up with the appropriate solution. It helps you understand your loved ones and act accordingly. But how can you identify your partner’s language? Good communication is the answer. It’s important to note that proper communication involves talking and actively listening as your loved ones express themselves to you. However, the fact that your spouse likes a certain language doesn’t mean that you stop expressing the other languages of love to them. Surprisingly, they can still be admirable to your partner though not as strongly as the primary language.